in a strange mood

wanna blog abt my job...wanna blog abt some strange stirrings inside of me... happier stuff first...perhaps after the happier stuff i wun blog abt weird stuff le..ah well..

actually bloggin abt my job isnt exactly tt happy leh..heh... well..my job's satisfying when i'm well appreciated..but when things are moving really slowly...time passes like a snail...but just the other day someone said i was pretty!!! wahahhahaha!!! dun worry..it aint some hum sup chiko peh but some nice s'porean auntie..hahah...and there was some aussie guy tt wanted to take a photo of me and my booth thinking tt i match the colour of my booth and stuff... i realised sth.. aussies like to say " YEAH?" in a really loud and surprised voice...they're not rude or like sacarstic but it's just funny to hear tt..hahaha.. it's like "we're giving a free bag with every 2 bottles.." "YEAH?!" ahahhaha....and i get affected by ppl's accent..some british will come to me asking for 'port'.. i think it's sth like sherry..it's just beside my booth..den they'll give the classic brit accent and i follow.. the indians...well...i try not to follow them..the india indians are really hard to understd actually..sometimes the ang mohs also..i just refer them to other ppl..haha..

well work is actually v super tiring..esp when u're packing all those bags of liquor..it's v superly duperly heavy can..and to stand for almost 8 hrs is really no joke hor..i can just heigu standing ard...sigh...but sales has been not too bad la..it's picking up..friday was a really busy day..it felt like i just packed the bottles den not too long after i need to pack em again cos they're all sold sold sold!but i feel quite happy when i sell them..haha..it's really satisfying..esp if ppl buy the more ex one..

ok...i'm still in the mood to write some rubbish.. heh

u noe, sometimes i jus feel friendless...i see ppl's pics on blogs or wad not..it's like more often than not they have a pic whereby it's just them and their best fren..just the 2 of them.. and i nv get to be in those pics.. i cant help but feel left out..it's sad u noe..but there's no one to blame for it right? no one but myself..my own fault tt i dun find frens and stick to them..and i dunno..maybe it's cos i'm a really passive person..hmm... i noe..my guy is one of my bestest buds liao but some times u cant help but really need a gal pal..most of my frens are so far far away from me i dunno how they can help in time..sigh..dunno how to feel..somehow feel my relationships with ppl are so forced or so fake sometimes..i noe i'm pretty much a joker.. i hide behind diff funny faces/expressions/jokes..sometimes i'm scared of ppl..well, i'm pretty much scared of rowdy ppl..mostly those v tall and big sized guys..but i'm also scared of ppl..i observe ppl behind my diff faces..i just tell a joke and watch them share it with the others or sth..watch them laugh tog..watch them slap each other on the arm..and den sometimes i think to myself..if i get into an accident of sorts..who will my mama call..will she even noe which fren to notify? and for those tt come to visit..how well do they noe me? did they come out of concern for me as a normal human being would? u noe if we knew someone was ill, we'd visit them..but how often do u go becos the patient is ur bestest bud and u're genuinely concerned cos they're ur bestest bud..

if i died i'm quite sure ppl will come cos they knew me once.. if my wake was for 3 days..they will prob come once..just for formalities' sake. and well, tt's plain sad. how many ppl seriously can truly say they knew me me me? if given a situation and asked to predict wad i'd do..how many ppl will be able to guess my reaction correctly?

well..i have lots of frens..but just how many can i truly call my 知己? suddenly feel quite sad..i look thru my folders of pics..sure i have tons of frens..really a lot..ppl think i'm sociable..making frens wherever i go...but i dun like it noe? i just make frens sometimes cos i need to survive and being friendless is plain sad. =o(

boy do i feel like crying